Not leaving the house for most of the week has been icky. Roads are just now getting better, so I’m going to go do something later, even if it’s just walking around shops. But I’m not sure yet.
Someone down the way from me might have passed, earlier. Two law enforcement vehicles parked on my end by the office, and then an ambulance showed up in front of a unit that one came to yesterday, and they motioned for the EMTs to put the gurney away and had a huddle outside the unit. Then the ambulance left. And an hour or so later, another vehicle came by and I guess they’re investigating. I hope the lady just waived off the ambulance or assistance, and maybe the person over there now is doing a secondary check of her, but it’s law enforcement, not medical, so I’m worried that the worst happened. (Update: It was an elderly man, not a woman. He just refused medical treatment. Whether he is okay or not…no clue. I hope he’s alright though.)
We watched the SIlver Linings Playbook on a stream, today. I saw it when it first came out, but now that I know and understand more about my own experience with Bipolar (and unironically how I’m essentially in a hospitalization program, even if not inpatient), Pat’s story makes more sense.
After our lunch break, we made list ideas of “stress relief pets.” These are micro-activities like petting your cat, or tending your plants, or blind journaling (where you turn the monitor off and just type for a few minutes). We’re going to talk about them tomorrow. At first, I chose my card trick where I come up with a story based on the cards I pull from the MTG packs (like I’ve talked about in the past). But the goal is “pet” as in simple, not complicated, and turning cards into stories might be a stretch. So I have to think about it a bit more.
During said class, I watched ITAV’s episode, which I’ve just fallen in love with more and more every show. Banger after banger after banger…I used to have a favorite, but I can say with my whole chest that all of them are just amazing so far. Corey Brotherson’s (today’s episode) is now my favorite. Lots of writing/workshop talk there, plus he was able to share his journey with a level of empathy and self-care that I wish to have in my own walk through becoming an established writer. That IMPoster syndrome is real, even when it’s about your own story or your own world or your own characters…
I think it’s why part of me writes so unfiltered on here. I want to see if I can actually put to paper (sic) what is going on in my head. I don’t care about hiding, I don’t have anything to lose. I’m also not trying to gain anything. Writing it all down is a part of the process of healing. I can go back to say…post #006 and see that yeah I was really really abusive to myself on that day. But I also know what triggered it and how I can prepare for next time. Like last week had zero blackouts. This week is looking really good as well, but there’s time left in the week…can’t be smug about it yet.
(Especially in cases of the unknown, like here)
And then I went outside to head to the office to take care of rent, and I noticed my car’s windshield had been scratched to shit:
Those scrape marks on the windshield are permanent. Like who tf did that? I have one witness and we’re also going to be pulling video to see who was responsible for it. Hopefully it’s one of those situations where a polymer coat can fix it, otherwise this is going to be expensive as hell. If it’s who I think it is, I know he wasn’t trying to damage my car…but he’ll be paying the bill or helping me do a big furniture item removal. If it was someone else, I want to find them and make sure they get the bill. Either way, someone gotta cover this, I just got this car in September. I’m not ready to spend insurance deductible on something unnecessary.
It was convenient that someone was being arrested, so there was a LEO around to ask “hey what channels do I go through to process that if it’s more than I can afford to fix? Because if it’s who I think it is, I ain’t mad, the guy just…he’s super smart like me…but has the common sense of a fence post sometimes…also like me.” The officer had a chuckle and empathized with the person in question, and said the easiest and cleanest way was to find out how much it would cost and settle without the help of law enforcement. If that couldn’t be met, *then* do what he said was the easiest and cleanest way. Hopefully the camera will show who did what and when so I can have a clean visual reference.
Anyway, that was my day. Eventful as hell…and I’m managing emotions quite nicely! I never got really overworked, other than using a lot of college words (my mom called curse words “college words” back in the day).
